Culture Shock..or shocked back to culture

I dedicate the first few lines of this post to try and formulate a reason for the long hiatus in writing a new post (largely because of my eager and anxious readers - I, me and myself plus all you jobless morons coerced into reading this blog by empty threats from yours truly and for the 25+ profile views I have gotten)......there simply isn't one apart from the usual "I'm too lazy to get my ass to write one and even more lazy to coax you people into reading this one".

Time Stamp - 11:30 pm, July 28, 2010. I landed at the Mumbai International Airport (a full 355 days before I was last there), heady with delight and eyes wide with anticipation....to smoke my first Indian cigarette in a long time (quoting Davidoff "Smokers die younger":P). Success, an obvious (un)wanted activation of the acetylcholine receptors (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tobacco_smoking) and a considerable decrease in my lifespan later, I made my way to the Domestic Terminal to wait for a flight (scheduled to leave 7 hours later!) to Singara Chennai. The Security Guard, while giving me the "How do I make money of him" gave me a curt debriefing (figurative!!!) on how I am not allowed to leave outside.

Time Stamp - 3:00 am, July 29, 2010. A gazillion songs, sessions of "Howzat Cricket" on Lounge' sad Wifi and several attempts at visual exercise later, the iTouch decides to play "BC Sutta" that led me to an obvious (albeit understandable) craving. I walked as nonchalantly as possible trying not to draw to much attention to ask the Security if there was a "loophole" in his strict rule. Below is the exact conversation.
Me - "Bhaiya, sutta marne ka hai"
Him - "Rules!"
Me - "Please, Hath per sab kheench gaya hai"(funnier in Tamil - "kai kal lam izhitukuchu")
Him - "Foreign Sutta hai?"
Me - "Phir?! Wo bhi Speshal!"
Him - "10 rs de. Aur do sutta de. Idhar hi mar le"
Me - ":-)"

Although it was during the Sutta session with him that I wondered how this was possible only in "Mera Bharath Mahan". Which brings me back to the crux of this post. I was (pleasantly with wisps of smoke floating around) shocked back to my own culture. Even in Chennai, although not a day went by with me not complaining about the dust, the dirt, the irritating auto drivers (with their pleasantaries about attending their mom's marriages) , the road crossers in T.nagar (which makes you literally go "canine of the female kind", the couples making out like they were on Muesli at Bessy (although secretly thinking "mera no kab aega?!") or even the incessant honking (which I am told has become the most spoken language after Tanglish), there would be only one place I really felt home.

An important point though, is none of this occurred to me even when I was experiencing all of this back home. Its when I came back, with the weight of having to greet every passer-by, or of having to roll my "r"s, or even of having to pay 5 times more for a cigarette I like 500 times lesser ( leading to a decrease in smoking on the up-side) that I realize "Swargame endralum adhu namma oora pola varuma" translated simply as "My town kicks even heaven's ass". http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5cDHxjP4_c

Disclaimer - This post is dedicated not only to my fellow Chennaites but to all you Country-cursing, MS/PHD-doing, Scene-putting Desis out there.